I have been putting off this post for over a week now. Scared, too painful, etc. But I've got to write it; now's better than "someday". And it's not entirely all bad news, but most of it is.
So, I've had difficulty in keeping up with child support payments. Heck, I've been having a lot of difficulty in keeping up with
everything; my income just doesn't stretch to cover everything. I've been dropping expenses left and right. (So painful to watch all of those domains just... go.)
I guess it was inevitable, but it was still a nasty shock a week ago Friday (6/27). My paycheck envelope was thicker than usual, and inside was documentation basically saying that the State was taking almost everything, effective immediately. My net pay for a week's worth of work was $86.
I handled things maturely. I asked if I could take my lunch at 10, and they allowed it. I took the half hour outside, by the creek, just to get my head straight and try to think through solutions. Clearly, I can't survive on $86/week.
I met with the Bosses later in the day, and told them what happened. (No, they're not told.) I told them I wasn't sure what my immediate plans were, but all of the different possibilities all led to the same conclusion, that I couldn't continue working there. I stressed that it had absolutely nothing to do with them, that they've been incredibly fair and flexible (which is 100% true). I asked what sort of notice they'd feel would be reasonable, and they said that "zero" would be fine with them. They've been very happy with my work quality/quantity and professionalism, and they completely understood that I might need zero notice, and that was fine. I told them I certainly appreciated that, and while I wasn't going to leave that day, I agreed that I'd probably need to do something quickly soon. I told them I'd work out the next week (i.e., last week) as scheduled, which was to be Mon/Tue/Thu as of then. I later found that Lucky needed me Wed & Thu for TV runs, so I ended up just working Mon & Tue for the marketing firm, and they were cool with that. For this current week, I told them I wouldn't commit to
any hours, but still planned to work for them for two or three days, and look for work the rest of the time.
Yes, I've seriously considered just chucking it all and moving to a
commune or another country or assuming a new identity or something, but running away is really not going to solve anything. I've made a ton of mistakes so far, and am trying to crawl my way out, and would rather not make yet another mistake by just running away.
One of the reasons that I've had to stay in the general Montgomery County (PA) area is in hopes of being able to see my son. It's been about seven months or so since I've seen him, and it doesn't look like that's going to change. Still, if I move away, the likelihood of being able to see him later is only going to decrease further. On the other hand, there might legitimately be more opportunity somewhere else, and I don't want to rule that out.
(Yes, I want to see my daughter, too, of course. But she's in California, so that doesn't factor in as much in the Philly-area-or-not question.)
( That Friday continued to be sh*tty.... )( Homeless again?... )( Clearly I need a better job.... )( After seeing that Obama has raised something like $300 million,... )And thanks for reading, by the way. I do appreciate all of you; it's nice to know I have supporters! :-)